I am writing a story! It is a very short story! It is stupid! (THAT'S IT, get in there with that self-correcting negativity before anyone else can ever criticize you first. Lord.) I meant to start writing it on exactly March 3, my day planner tells me! (My day planner is my portable memory, because sure as shit the one in my head doesn't work.) I believe I first had the idea to write this story in....DECEMBER 2012! (Saith the planner.) Jesus. WHAT A WAY TO RUN A RAILROAD. Well, why not start and go on with it now, this is exactly why I trained myself out of watching TV and never log in to Facebook, so I won't get distracted. Because clearly, that is not at all any kind of problem.
301 words! WHOO. I actually just wrote "breaking into an infectious smile," which, oh my fucking God. As one of my best writing buddies used to say: WRITE IT NOW. FIX IT LATER. Irresistible! An irresistible smile. At least it doesn't sound like his teeth have STDs.
-- I have a headache, I have no coffee, I have no chocolate, I have pancreatitis, I am no longer a writer of any kind, not even a blogger, why am I doing this? Well, it's sorta....fun. God, I remember when writing was FUN. When the hell did that go away?.....oh, grad school, in about 1995, that's right. Man. Maybe I can sue UNM.
-- I need a soundtrack! Everyone these days writes to a soundtrack. I'm sure in the amount of time it would take me to fix up the perfect soundtrack this sudden urge to write would not wither and die at all. ....no, no, this is the Raymond Chandler School of Writing here. You can do one of two things: 1) write. 2) Look out the window. Annie Dillard went so far as to draw a perfect rendition of the view outside her office one semester (no catwaxing there), then drew the shade and taped it over the actual view. No Facebook-checking, no Google Reader-substitute-hunting, no balancing the checkbook (does anyone still do that anymore), no soundtrack-making. You can write, or you can be bored. I cannot stand to be bored, ever, so let's hope this works.
-- A dear dear friend of mine used to say: watch the movie. Trust the movie. Pay attention only to the images unspooling in your head. Listen to the characters, not anything else. Just write what you see. (This works perfectly for me because I am a completely visual person and I space out completely when I write because it actually is like an internal movie. Other friends are non-visual writers, and this just makes them bitter.)
-- Liveblogging, also a distraction. Whoops, update this later.
descensus Averno facilis est