Let’s say BuzzFeed reviewed “Aftermath” in the manner of Camilla Long. Let’s further say the review — like other products featured in BuzzFeed — was helpfully linked to an online retailer such as Amazon.com, which pays affiliate-marketing commissions to referring sites. Let’s say the review called the book “a needy, neurotic mandolin solo.”Let’s think about the click-through rate for that item: How much commission do you think the referrer — BuzzFeed in our hypothetical case — would earn for its brutal takedown of a book by “a brittle little dominatrix?” Actually, don’t answer that question, answer this one: How meaningless does a five-star review seem now?But never mind the e-commerce business model. To my way of thinking, BuzzFeed’s heroic initiative will succeed even if it merely eradicates the depressing negativity that has for so long kept literary criticism from becoming a full-fledged economic sector, like agriculture, transport and erectile dysfunction.It also brings us one step closer to my two lifelong dreams: first, a newspaper that delivers only good news; and second, diet bacon.
descensus Averno facilis est